The last few months have been more than trying for me. It’s been one hell of a roller coaster ride and once upon a time this would have thrown me right off track and torn me apart. I have met the last few months with betrayal, hurt, sadness, loss, violence, and many many tears. But I have also met the last few months with happiness, faith, love, strength, and many many laughs.
Even though I have been pummelled into the ground, hit by a Mack truck and steamrolled more than just a few times – I still stand here, tall, firm and proud. The joke’s on you life… I’m stronger than that now.
As I sit here writing this, today has been an emotional day for me. A day of rebirth if you will. I look back on my life, the choices I’ve made, the things I have been through, the hurt I have caused and the hurt I’ve been dealt. And you know what? I’m not sad about how my life has turned out so far. Quite the opposite as a matter of fact!
You know what? I am actually damn proud of the person I am today. It took everything I had, every ounce of my being and I fought so damn hard, every single day to be the person I am today. I am happy. I am strong. I am smart. I run a successful business. I make shit happen! And while I’m not quite living my ideal life yet, I am certainly well on my way.
But I’ve got to stay humble. The reality is, I wouldn’t be who I am if not for my past. All the joy and the pain, the laughter and the tears, the lying and the betrayal. Everything bad, everything good. My past does not define me, but I am who I am today because of it. And for that, I am thankful. I can proudly say that I’m certainly not the person I used to be. If you knew me even just 5 years ago… I’m not that person anymore either. Always growing. I’m always trying to be better than I was yesterday.
Staying positive and grounded are both very important in life. But you also have to love what you do and love who you are! This means taking risks. Stepping out of your comfort zone and taking chances. It means standing up when everyone else sits down. It means holding your ground for what you believe in and not letting anyone dissuade you from your reaching your goals.
Self doubt is the anchor that keeps our ships from sailing. Believe in yourself and you will get there. We often don’t do things out of basic fear. We settle into “safe and secure” because it’s easier – but it doesn’t make us happy. So many of you are just wading through life, in a job you hate and/or in a relationship you’re just not happy in. Or maybe you’re just living a life that you’re ‘meh, ok’ with. You stay in that cycle BECAUSE of fear.
Take a moment and think to yourself… If fear and money were of no object… What does your ideal life look like? No seriously, do it. Really think about it. Write it down in great detail. Would you like a big house, with 4 cars, 2 maids and a personal chef? How are the bills getting paid? How much money do you earn and how do you earn it? What do you spend your free time doing? Really truly picture your ideal life. Be realistic, but embellish as much as possible too. In other words, winning the lottery is not your ideal life, but having your dream job that lends itself to your financial freedom, that’s completely realistic!
Did you do it? No? Stop reading and do it! I’m serious. Don’t worry. I’ll wait……
Alright, so do you have it all written down now? Your wildest, craziest dreams! Your most ideal, more than perfect life! Read it over one last time. I mean it. Do it now.
Now ask yourself…. Why aren’t you living this life or at the very least, working towards it?
If you are, that’s great! Kudos to you! However, if you’re like most people and you asked yourself this question honestly, you most likely started to hear all the bullshit excuses piling up in your head real fast! “I don’t have the money or the means. My job doesn’t allow. My family would never! I have responsibilities, I can’t just up and go! This is just a foolish exercise!” All these excuses are your self-doubts coming to life. This is the fear that’s stopping you from actually living! We choose to listen to our self-doubt and settle for a life that is less than ideal because fear blankets us with a false sense of safety and security. This is why 90% of the world’s population is just surviving and not actually LIVING!
STOP THAT SHIT WILL YOU!!!!
Maybe not everything in your ideal life is actually plausible (sorry but you’ll never marry Channing Tatum so stop wishing girl!) but that big house with your perfect job? Those are perfectly tangible goals. Dude! Make that shit happen! Seriously! What are you waiting for? You are the only person who controls how your life ends up. No one is going to make it happen for you.
I really attribute TRUE success to your level of happiness. Success and TRUE success are not the same things. Let me explain… there is a certain type and level of success that can be bought. That’s not true success. That’s cheating. True success comes from happiness, passion, motivation and the hard-ass-work of loving who are and who you’re aiming to become!
But it all begins with not being afraid of change. Embrace change. Release fear. Sure it’s scary. It’s not safe and it’s not secure. But take those risks and push yourself to do the things you’ve always wanted to but never felt you actually could do or were just simply too afraid to do! That’s where your true power lies.
LOVING YOURSELF IS THE HARDEST THING YOU’LL EVER DO!
But it’s also the most important thing you’ll ever do. So I challenge you to take that ideal life you have written down, separate the plausible from the extreme and break that shit down into small goals – start working towards your ideal life! But your first goal, your main goal, your hardest goal, your biggest goal, should be to start loving yourself first and build it up from there. Don’t let fear stop you. Believe in yourself and you’ll soar higher than you ever dreamed possible. Start living your ideal life. It won’t happen overnight so be kind to yourself. Failure isn’t walking away. Failure is not trying again on another day. It’s all about having that vision and taking those baby steps. And throughout your trials and tribulations, you must remain positive, stay focused, stay humble and kind and simply remind yourself every day that you need these ups and downs in order to help you grow into your ideal life. You got this!